Saturday, December 03, 2005

How I miss KL

Musings in KL

Just between you and me, I must tell you
that I am no KL-ite. Home is tucked away
placidly up north. But KL is like a second
home, like your mother-in-law’s place,
a home that you marry into, something that
creeps into you with a perverse familiarity.
Like the traffic jam, the haze, Federal Highway,
the mamak stall near Sogo, the cacaphonic rush
of the lunch time crowd.

So, what right do I have to talk about KL?
Come onlah, people are all here to make a
living. I am one of the crowd.

If KL was a woman, she will be a whore.
A classy one at that. I am just the average
Malaysian, one of the clients she services.
I must say that she solicits with a randy
suggestiveness-all those palm fronds and
light strobes for this paradisical, touristy feel.
Just the way the orang puteh like it.

Looks very nice on the postcard, this
two dimensional cut-out. Then again,
the ringgit rolls in, so who is to say anything?

She has over the years taken to embellish
herself with these towering monstrosities.
Her crowning glory of course is that Twin Towers
which stick out like giant phalluses with a
self-righteous kiasu smirk. I must tell you that
it is all show and not much performance.
A lot of bluff really.

After all, she is not that nubile nymphet anymore.
There are lines under her eyes and the breasts are sagging.
That is why the need for this coarse touch-up:
to proffer this exotic, pseudo-rustic face.
Or else, she is wont to lose her clients.
But then again, these are modern times and
this is your archetypical modern woman. If you
want an anak dara you had better balik kampung.

But take heart.
I will share a secret. She really is
a very beautiful woman, inside and out.
After all she did not ask to look like this.
This was a fate thrust onto her by
those who Know Best.

Give her time.
As sweet and true as first kiss,
you will realise that the raunchy
side has a heart.

Most of all be patient.
Take time to journey into the marrow of her spirit.
Learn to understand her mood and colours.
Unravel that volatile chameleon, denude her off
that cosmetic face. Traverse into her and she will
take you into her folds.

And there, you will see a coy mistress. Quite
unsure of herself. Trembling and aching for an
honest lover. She will give you her soul with
so much trust, you can weep, man.
She will share with you hopes, dreams, fears.
Success and failures.
Laughter and tears.

Then you will want the whore
for a wife.To grow old and grey with.

I wish that she (and all women) came with an instruction

But maybe, you will find her amidst
the throng of humanity in Jalan Ampang,
jasmine garlands in Little India,
the crisp vigour of growth in Kampung Baru,
the strain of bargain in Petaling Street,
the deep rumble of the LRT,
the balik kampung exodus.

(c)Jane Sunshine (2001)


At 12/03/2005 08:23:00 pm, Blogger Maya said...

Lovely Jane!

But funny, I always thought of KL as a man, not young, not old but just right to tempt me. In fact I felt every inch a whore, allowing myself to be seduced by this worldly guy who was so keen and intent in impressing me and always one step ahead. Sometimes I am happily satisfied while at others I wish there was more foreplay, phalluses notwithstanding. Why the hurry, the preoccupation I can't tell. Now if he had a mother-in-law or a wife who cuckolded I'd understand...:)

At 12/04/2005 05:04:00 am, Blogger Ely said...

sounds like San Francisco and me. i have no comments about this place. kinda love it, kinda dont. got here due to my marriage and with the people i love.

given a chance, i would love to move back to Singapore.

but for now, i can say that i DO love my life jugak.

eh eh, sini salah sana pun salah, betul tak?

*am i whining?*

At 12/04/2005 08:56:00 am, Blogger Kak Teh said...

my last 'wham bang, thank you ma'am,' as you know was just a few weeks ago - and that was brief but left me wanting for more - for that is how it shd be, right?

At 12/05/2005 06:19:00 am, Blogger may said...

to know her is to love her. as with any other city, town, place, a real woman too ;) faults and all.

At 12/05/2005 06:16:00 pm, Blogger Jane Sunshine said...

Maya: That's a very interesting impression of the city. I think that it is the memories and dreams of each one of us that's lodged in the KL we know. At the end of the day, it is everybody's KL.

Ely: Yeah, a city is always a pivotal character in our laughter and tears.

KT: I think once we live there and love her, we never can get over her. Ever.

May: Yeah, loving despite the faults. That's the real deal.

At 12/06/2005 03:30:00 pm, Blogger fishtail said...

Wow, well written. First time I read KL being personified this way.

At 12/08/2005 11:24:00 pm, Blogger Jane Sunshine said...

Fishtail: Hello. And thank you.

At 1/19/2006 11:40:00 am, Anonymous Epi said...

echoing fishtail above, this is easily one of the best writing I've read on blogosphere abt KL. It's deliciously love Jane Sunshine. I absolutely love your imagery.

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